Sunday, October 26, 2014

5 of 15- AM.

After 5 days you've adjusted to the running around, in and out of rooms.
You've learned to sleep through the 6am fights and only yell at the top of your lungs if you hear something break.
You learn the difference between a pretend cry, a laugh cry and a real cry.
You conform to the fact that there is going to be laundry every day and there will be alot of it.
You've come to terms with the idea that something taking five minutes will really take thirty.
You prepare yourself for the fights over what to watch on TV and who is on the computer first.
You know there's going to be someone who doesn't like dinner and they'd much rather have tomato sauce on crackers.
You utilize the older ones and brush it off when they complain under their breath.
You're ready for the begging when you stop at the grocery store and you've got the act of being mentally sound down as you walk with them all through the store.
You've mastered how to block them out when you're driving in the car and they're calling out your name to tell on someone, in unison and repetitiously.
I've learned to look forward to waking up in the morning to do it all over again.

They're good kids. Weird, but good.
I've had worse kids for less than 2 hours that have sent me into lunacy. Let's face it, I've always had a soft spot for this particular brother's kids.

Ain't no thaaang but a chicken wing.

In saying that, they're going to spend the day with their Aunty and cousin. This equals freedom. Going to sit at my Mum's all day and pretend I'm 10 years old again.

Saturday, October 25, 2014

4 of 15 - Evening Edition.

Playing at home in the morning. Laundry. Karaoke. Prepping for town at Nans. The Park. Planning for Christmas. Wheel-chairing. Golf at The Parentals & home for Nan's venison stew.

Take note Furn's and Michelle. Thanksgiving, Christmas Eve and Christmas menu's are out.
Simple this year, but tasty. Aunty Tashi also decided the Secret Santa will be done for Christmas Eve. We'll pull names at a FHE next month.

I'm less a kid again tonight. He's the one that torments Rome under his breath when he thinks no one can hear. Everyone is made aware of it when Rome's distress calls begin. That's when big sister lays some threats. All I can do is roll my eyes because it always happens in the car when we're driving somewhere.

Good day today. MDO religion tomorrow. The kids are going to spend the day with their Aunty. She didn't look too keen when I asked her if she was ready for five kids. The baby girls are asleep. There's a drunken party next door. I was warned about it a month ago and I'm appreciative that my neighbors have the courtesy to advise ahead re: stuff like that. It makes the vibration of my house more bearable.

Mitchy has neglected her children today via correspondence. I imagine she and Freckles are living it up in Bangkok! Brother 1 keeps ringing.

Just ringing to see if the kids are alright.
And what if they weren't?
Shut up. I'm just asking.
For real, what would you do if they weren't alright?
Shut up you son of a bee sting.

35 21 and 38 and still talking like we're teenagers. Told my Mum today that I would have been a great mother of five.
In the same breath I thanked Heavenly Father that I wasn't.

4 of 15 - Morning Version.

Morning reports.

Shaily is the lazy one. She won't move unless you threaten to disconnect her WiFi. She's the one to hit Jeston when he picks on Rome.

Nessa is the moody one. She'd rather not be here with her siblings, which is why she's at Nans for the entire time. She would have prefered being an only child.

Jeston's the cheeky one. He deserves a good hard kick in the nads, but I think he's hilarious. He picks on his sisters while we aren't looking.

Rome's the moaner. She cries to get people in trouble and she resembles a train horn when she does it. Her whining is like fingernails on a blackboard.

Hubba think's they're all crazy and inquires often about when they're going home. "I just want no kids in my place".

Camp Mother. Not crazy yet. Only 1/4 way up the wall.


700 days without my one in a million.

Thanks Mitchy & Brother 1 for the bottle of Jean Paul.
Love you long time.

Friday, October 24, 2014

3 of 15.

Woke up. Cleaned the kids rooms because I know they won't and it's not worth my breath to remind them to. Now I know why their mother does it and I scorn her for it every time she does. It's ok .. I had this information in my head before they came and 'cleaning their room' is basically making the one-blanket-bed and opening the blinds.

I have laundry baskets in each room. This is a common practise in my house. Two in the bathroom that has towels in it and the other for whites. They have not caught on with the system yet. Your room, your laundry basket. So when I find clothes in with the towels, I yell give them a gentle reminder.

I was moody before noon because my brother and his kids showed up and they all stayed for two hours. I just wanted to leave and go somewhere while the sun was still shining. An hour into his stay, the wind and rain came. And so it was, the weather confined us to the house. There was fighting and arguing and laziness.





These two kept busy all afternoon.

It's 10pm and they've just gone to bed. I am glad.
2 of 5 have gone to spend the night with their Aunty and cousin, who are in town for the long weekend. I miss the boy. He's pretty funny. I wanted to send Rome with them, but they said, "Oh, no it's ok". I was as offended as her mother gets when I say "No thanks" to the same request.
Sisters Diwali photo. Sharing because it's neat-o.

Nina arrives in Thailand tonight. She and Mitchy will be starring in a ping pong show together.

Vlog - Singing Children.

You can believe in Christ.

Aboriginie song from The Sapphires movie.

Ka Waiata ki a Maria.
Video bomber at 1:20.

Sing now to Mary,
Who said "Yes"
To hold the house of mankind

Beautiful Woman
Generous Woman

Peaceful Woman

The Mother

The Mother
Of the World.

Thursday, October 23, 2014

2 of 15.

My hats off to all Mothers who have more than 1 child. I have tamed mine. The invaders are another story. Breakfast this morning consisted of arguments because someone was eating too loud.

I almost gave this fish the day off to help relieve me from time to time, but she had brains and went to school instead.

Threaten with death and the braid stayed in all day.

Much needed Lewis Road Creamery Choc Milk by Whittakers. Worth the overpriced $3.40. There's a scene from Bridesmaids when the main character Annie drives into the estate of the other bridesmaid Helen and she's given pink lemonade by a waiter as she drives toward the house. Her reaction after drinking the pink lemonade was exactly the same as my reaction to the chocolate milk. It's like half n half with melted chocolate in it.

For Mitchy.
Today at McDonalds.

The vege garden a week later.

After school swimming in their new pool.

Mr. Naughty.

Grandma Rome watering the plants.

Off to Nans to visit Neo.

Dinner at Nan's with the Craig & Fa'alele cousins.

Watching Uncle Jestons hunting videos. I'm rolling my eyes. Look at that fools face .. he's amazed at himself.

I now regret that it's a 4-day weekend. I sent a text to my sister and Mum that likened parenting 5 kids to monkey privates. I then locked myself in the Livians van and regathered my chi until my Mum got home. Then Aunty Emma arrived with the cousins and all was right in the world.

Lyrically challenged and selective hearing.

Yesterday Hubba began to sing the healing incantation song from Tangled. As usual, Shaily tried to harmonize then began singing the second verse.

Eugene has been hurt ..
It's not Eugene.
Yes it is. Eugene has been hurt.
It's not Eugene.
It's HEAL what has been hurt.
No. It's Eugene. Eugene has been hurt, save the fat design.
That doesn't even make sense. It's Heal what has been hurt, change the fates design.

Google told us what it was and she was wrong.

While I'm at it .. a few other lyrical errors with the family.

Oriwa on Open Arms by Journey/Mariah.
"Softly you whisper, your saucy sin"
Actual lyric:
Softly you whisper, you're so sincere.

My Sister on You Sexy Thing by Hot Chocolate.
"I've been eating wrinkles"
Actual lyric:
I believe in miracles.

Mum on Hallelujah by Leonard Cohen
"I heard there was a secret sword and Davy prayed to please the board"
Actual lyrics:
I heard there was a secret chord, that David played and it pleased the Lord.

Hubba on the National Anthem
"God of Nations stinky feet .. "
Actual lyric:
God of Nations at thy feet.

Wednesday, October 22, 2014

1 of 15

6.30am wake up for an airport drop off.
There were no tears until we left. Sister told me Mitchy cried when we left. Mitchy told her. It's the circle of gossip life, you can't get away from information when it comes to sisters. Last text received from Mitchy was when she boarded her flight to Bangkok. Before I sent the kids to bed, I showed them a real time tracker of her flight. She's currently hovering over the top of Australia and has just under 5 hours left in flight.

What I've learned today after 12 hours as Camp Mother.
1. I'm glad I don't have 5 kids.
2. When you tell a child "I'll give you 5 minutes and that's it", you really do forget to keep track.
3. Laundry magically appears out of no where.
4. Washing 2 kids at once is self torture.
5. Rome's long hair needs to be cut. Took me 45 minutes to brush that mop. I've threatened her with death if she undoes her braid tomorrow at school.
6. Hubba is territorial. She keeps asking when they're going home.
7. Fighting over the TV remote has the potential to start a world war.
8. The Internet is another form of babysitting.
9. I sympathise with my sister, who has a habit of sitting in her closet and crying because of children.
10. F words bring smiles, not fear.
11. Chocolate is a childs valium.
12. I miss their mother more than they do because of the above.
I am SO glad it's my Mums day off tomorrow and SO glad it's a holiday weekend because we're all going to live at her house for the 4-day weekend.

Primary Presentation practise tonight at the chapel at the same time the youth had their combined activity. Holi. Looked funtastic.

Bishops son Soul.

Bishops daughter Sequoia on the left.

Sequoiks and Shaily.

Bishops daughter Shalloe.

Nessy Nu, fresh to young women's!


Bishops baby Seazer.

Bishops son Scout in blue on the right.

Two of Bishops kids are missing. Suede, who is on his mission, and Storey, who was distressing Rome.

Children in bed.
All is well.