Wednesday, November 26, 2014

November: Almost over.

Things haven't been in routine since the Bangkok trip back in October. Each week after, something has happened that has put everything out of whack. Even after last week, this week is out sync because Tyler is here.

Lack of routine makes a naughty child.

She has been warned today that none of the shenanigans from the last 6 weeks are going to fly anymore. She didn't take me seriously, so I got serious. Once her new favourite Uncle Reid leaves on Friday, everything should be in place for the true order of things here at 35.

I should give up for the festive season. With Christmas and school holidays quickly approaching, I'm kidding myself if I think any normalcy is going to be found this side of the new year.

It was so hot today I could have kicked someone square in the teeth.

My car has smelled like fish since Saturday. I tried all I could, but the smell got worse. Accused Tyler of creating the smell and forced Coral into my boot/trunk to sniff it out. It came from some bowls someone hadn't washed properly. Raw fish juice marinated two of three bowls in the pack and it was d-i-s-g-u-s-t-i-n-g.

#3. Aunty BJ.

Monday, November 24, 2014

2 years.

Unloaded the other camera. Here is the biggest chow mein I ever did make. It must be a world record or something.

At Dads Saturday night. Sitting around talking.

Nan, Brother 3 and Aunty Carol.

Singing Happy Birthday to Uncle Bebs.

Today for FHE we cleaned the family graves. It was a team effort. The concrete bases were a fail. Larry's was not concrete for this reason.

2 years ago today he decided he'd had enough and closed his eyes forever.Two years later, there is contentment. The void is still there, but the pain has eased.

Sunday, November 23, 2014


The funeral was short and sweet. A nice send off for Jazzy. The whole week has been out of order and the funeral was to match. Nothing went to program, but it all worked out fine. Very proud of my brothers for their efforts and Priesthood.

Jazz's coffin was wrapped in traditional siapo. It's a decorative art form that is used in several ceremonial occasions. It's typical in the Polynesian cultures and is used to wrap sacred things in.

Parents. Nikki & Dad.

My Papa Allen dedicated her grave.

The kids.

My Dad's parents. Nan Anne, Nan Penny (Step-Mother) and Pops Allen.

Tyler & Demps.

The lads.

Brother 3, Tyler & Sister.


Brother 2, Brother 3 and Brother 1.

Trying to set up a photo with all the kids was disastrous.

Shaily and her Dad.

With Emma and Darlene. My Reid cousins have been amazeballs this past week. Actually no, only Emma and her 4 kids :) There's me in the back. That's all you're getting sorry.
I HATE having to be in photos.

Brothers with my Dad's youngest brother Roma. He is the same age as Brother 2.

My Lush photo bombs.

Brothers with our Grandfather.
This weekend I've learned that my Great-Grandfather on my Samoan side comes from a Scottish line. My great-grandmother hails from an Irish line, Bourne. Somewhere in the mix you add in a China man and a Samoan. Mix that with Maori and European blood and you get me and my siblings.
A cocktail.

Back to the farm to spend the last evening with all the family. Bless the house. Brothers blessed Dad & Nick and learned some family history from an Aunty.

Also had fun watching these winners get drunk.

After all of that ... please put me in the hole the same day. All that other crap is not worth the sore feet and lack of sleep.
Brother 3s birthday was also yesterday.

Friday, November 21, 2014


Well shishi.
Someone needs a lesson on how to be a Maori.
Dropped lots of f-bombs today and appreciate two things. The facilities of a marae and the option to take the dead home. Do not appreciate lateness and miscommunication or no communication. That shiz just doesn't fly with me, but it's come together nicely thanks to SOS phone-calls and a decision to step on peoples feet despite offense.

My Mum is my hero and my cousin Emma is a close runner up. Vanessa (sis in laws sister) is up there too.

So glad that bloody school production is over though.
That was like vinegar in a lobster bisque.

Poor Tyler fractured her ankle today at my Mums and no one cared. She tends to break alot of things because she's straight up clumsy so when no one took her seriously, she lay on the floor at my Mums and cried. This makes me sad just thinking about it. Today was busy and I didn't have time to think about it, because it was so blasé to everyone else, that I treated it as such.
Until I saw her and all I saw was little baby Tyler who needed her dummy.

After a trip to the hospital. That's my Dad btw, finding humor in her situation.

Things that happened today that stood out:
1. Saw my paternal Grandfather after 22 years (introduced myself as Beyonce).
2. Saw my Aunty after 22 years and met all her kids.
3. Said an opening prayer in front of more than ten people. (small steps)

Brother 2 arrives in the morning. I have not seen him for 5 years. He's the one that won't be able to keep in together. He's a hard nut on the outside, but a softy in the middle. All five of us have not been together since 2000.

Thursday, November 20, 2014


We kept our kids out till 2am.
Jazzy got home around 11pm.
The whole experience of tonight is deservant of a post on it's own, but I will tell you this .. I love my sisters .. even the ones with fake boobs that she got from Thailand.


Tuesday, November 18, 2014

Off the hezzy.

Found out today just how much power my phone battery has. I was placed in the middle of funeral planning and I tell you what ... it's harder planning a funeral for your younger sister, who had a whole life ahead of her, than it was to plan one for your sick husband.

Told myself not to cry, but I've been borderline while I write up her funeral program for Saturday. Looking at old photos of her at the ages where I liked her the best (18 months), and the times that I missed because I moved on with my life.

My Dad asked today if I wanted to help dress her. I couldn't keep it together for Aunty Marva and just couldn't for Larry. I offered my temple dress for Jazz to wear and this bought my Dad to tears. I'm going to do her temple work and I told him that today. She deserves it as much as any of us.

I miss her. We get her back tomorrow from the Coroner. She will spend a night at the farm with Dad & Nicki (her Mum) and come here to the marae on Thursday. I talked my Dad into an LDS service at our chapel and she'll be buried at the back of our chapel in the Urupa.

My older brothers are in the works to come home. I haven't seen one of them for over 5 years. Livian just left for his last stint pre-Christmas on Wednesday.

... she really did get a heavy dose of the Chinese blood in us.

Love you long time Jazzy.


The shortest scripture in the bible is found in the book of John where Christ weeps over the death of Lazarus. Jesus knew Lazarus would live again, but he was so moved by the grief and sorrow of Lazarus' sisters that it bought him to tears. So he wept.

My heart is troubled because my Dad is grief stricken, but I am not sad because I know that Jaz lives again on an incomparible cosmos. I know that it is ok to cry, but it won't come because I know this. Showing weakness around people who are hovering at an emotional rock bottom is like salt on wounds. Someone has to be strong.

*raises hand*

In the paper today. The red beamer.

Monday, November 17, 2014

A sombre day.

One person has died after a crash on SH2 at Tangoio just after 12.30pm today.

The crash, involving a car and a utility vehicle, happened near the Tangoio Settlement Rd which runs off the highway about 17km north of Napier.

A second person received what police said were minor injuries.

The highway was closed about 2km north of the intersection while emergency crews worked at the scene and serious crash officers carried out a scene examination.

Police were advising people intending to travel that way to delay their plans as no diversions had been put in place. It was not known what time the road would re-open.

No other details were available.
 - Hawkes Bay Today 

I don't talk much about my half-siblings. I have 2 of them, and 2 step-sisters and 1 step-brother for that matter. I saw my half-brother about a week ago. He was at The Warehouse buying fireworks. I asked about my half-sister Jazminn. She was moving home soon. I saw her about a month ago in town. Usually I hide from her because she's a bit of a critical-fish (like Sister 1), but as she bore towards me with a smile on her face, I welcomed it and I'm so glad that I did.

This evening I saw her again in the hospital morgue wearing the same smile, for real. She looked baby-like and at peace with her demise. She was 27.

I wish my Dad & Step-Mother understood what I do. I couldn't cry for her because I'm happy for her. While we stood around her spiritless body, Brother 3 offered a prayer that I very much so appreciated. Then my Uncle prayed to Jah (Rastafari), which was rather entertaining.

It's no coincidence that Hubba and I sang Beautiful Zion most of the day.
It was just one of those days.

Thither I press with eager feet;
There shall my rest be long and sweet.

I promise you it will be sweet Jaz.

Sunday, November 16, 2014

Home again.

I have a headache after a 6 hour drive all the way home. I'd been telling my nieces to beat up their brother the entire trip. I kept telling them that they're both too scared to beat him up and so he keeps being a smart ass. That streak ended today when I watched Shaily jump over the back seat, through the rear view mirror, and pound on Brother 1's only son. Their Dad would have stopped the car so quick to protect his son then tell us all it was our fault and not the boys.
I pulled over to the side of the road and flicked on the hazards to watch the phenomenon.

Recognizing the round about that leads us home after being on the Napier expressway, we hear from the back seat.
"My house lives here!".

Glad to be home now. I love home.
Missed church today where Ev was called as the new Bishop of our ward. I must remember not to swear around him, if he remembers to do the same ;) Great news for the family. I wish we all could have been there to support, but I was dodging Primary Presentation that got postponed last minute for Stake Business.

... and here's Bebi watching the Kiwi's haka last night.